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So, last night I had my last classes of the year. Now I'm officially done for the year. I can kick back, relax, and use the money I hocked from my textbooks for xmas gifts. On the train ride back from Pleasantville, I started thinking about this year. For starters, it went by pretty freakin quickly. Months just blurred into one another, and in a damned rush.
But damn, a lot was done.
To Preface, this was the first full year out of college. After spending four years in Albany, this was the first extended time I've had in my house, with my family, in my city. At first, I wasn't sure what to do. Sad to say, the closest friend I had was in New Jersey, and as close as that is, it's not the City. For the first few months, I did the solo act thing. Running around the city and taking photos, seeing the parts of NYC that I hadn't been. I was reconnecting with my home. However, I was still doing this alone.
Then I met the guys from the Jim Butcher Boards, Priscilla, Richard and his wife, Sue. I had people I could meet, talk to on an even level (which wasn't usually the case at college). I had made friends based on actual interest rather than "We're trapped at this school, we might as well talk". Of course, this was in late 2008, but we hadn't really started hanging out until that winter. After the new year though, we went to more and more events until finally we went to New York Comic Con.
It was there that I met the NY Jedi, those loveable batch of nerds, geeks, theater whores and outright loons. After meeting them, and then going to classes, I felt like I had always been there. For those of you who know me, I've always felt like the outsider, the person looking on from outside the walls. This was true and exacerabated at college, even amongst my own friends. But here was a group where there was no drama in the indvidiuals (note: I do not say the group). They were just a bunch of people who liked being active and nerdy. These were people I could run around with while still being intellectual, creative, manic, and weird.
Before I knew it, I started getting more and more involved in the group. December 5th it culminated with me performing with them in a show I had written for them. Not to make too big a deal of it, but after that night I felt like I had put most of my past behind me. I was no longer the shy, painfully weird boy in college. I had become something altogether different. I feel different. I feel like I can make my life here, I can make it whatever I want to be, and that I have the talent to do it.
As much as I sound like I'm razzing on College, let me say that I probably couldn't have gotten to this point without having gone to Albany and meeting all those people. The problem was disconnect, the feeling that I was playing a different game than most of the people there. I don't regret going up there, or going to Albany. I got my drive to write, to express, from there. Yes, it might have initially been out of anger and about how pissed I was at the overall state of things. But it helped define me as who I am.
It's my turn.
That's not to that to say that this whole year has been one large triumph. There are somethings I wish I had, some things that I regret not getting. I am still without employment, even in my own field. Yes, I know the job environment sucks, yes, I know it's doubly worse in New York itself. However I still think I could have put myself out more.
Another thing I felt I lacked, was someone to share all this with. I had an awesome year, and everytime I come home, I share it by myself. I don't know if I'm overly sentimental, but there are nights where I just wish I had someone to just lie next to, to know is there. There have been girls this year who I've been close with, but due them being unavailable (currently dating, too far away, not looking for anyone at the time) nothing has really happened. Ironically, like finding a job, I feel like I need to put myself out there more.
I'm going to try and walk into 2010 with the attitude and confidence that I received in 2009. For once in a long time, I can walk with clear confidence and pride in myself. And that's a good start as any.
Happy New Year!
C
And since I don't even think he knows this exists, and barely anyone reads this who would even have the slightest chance of knowing him...I think I'm falling for you.
- Mood:
calm - Music:CSI
Last night was the opening for "A Saber Beats Four Aces", the inaugural show featuring the Poker Night format. It opened up at The Tank Theater to a jam packed crowd of friends, family and one or two surprises I'll mention later.
As the creator and "writer" of the show, I had a lot going through my mind. The chief among them being "How in the hell" did I get here?
I had created Poker Night this past summer. I based alot of it on the communal nature of New York and Long Island Jedi. For most at NYJ, we've done the post class Diner session. We all talk, tell stories, get cut off and corrected. And Long Island Jedi is one big, happy cult/family/nerd orgy to begin with. In fact, the idea came from bouncing ideas off of Joe after a LIJ visit.
So I wrote the show based on that premise. I also took into consideration to several problems from previous shows, most notably building a fight solely for the scene, and especially for if a cast member mysteriously vanishes before the show. So I made it modular, swapping out whatever fights needed.
I submitted the show in July, and it was received well by the group. I didn't make much of it though. At that point I was only in my fifth month with the group, I wasn't sure if I overstepped my bounds in the group or anything, so I let it rest.
By September, we received word that we were going to do a show at The Tank theater. The show picked was Sabers Unleashed, the show that had introduced me to NY Jedi in the first place. Brandon had then said that he was working on a sequel to Sabers Unleashed, and that I was going to write the third show.
Flashforward to six weeks ago. Due to a slew of cons, parades and other events, Sabers Unleashed was running far behind in schedule. It was becoming apparant that we couldn't do SU faithfully in under six weeks. So, people began suggesting doing another show. I had off handedly mentioned Poker Night, not thinking it would be taken seriously. Next thing I know, I get a text saying "We're on for Poker Night, what do you need to write it?"
I, ever the soul of wit, replied...
"Uh...WHAT!?"
We had the cast and the fights down pretty quickly. To be honest, that's the minimum the show needed. Everything else is gravy. The cast got together and meshed quickly and started riffing off one another (most of which got added into the defacto script I was using). The show had essentially been written, albeit verbally, the very night it was agreed upon.
Of course, we had to do all of this in six weeks. We were essentially shotgunning this show. Because of that, incidences happened, toes got stepped on. You know, the usual theater stuff, just condensed.
Finally, yesterday rolls along. I wake up with a swollen throat and my head clogged in places I wish I didn't know about. Naturally, right? As the day rolled on, I found I was too medicated and too busy to worry about the show.
Until thirty minutes until. At that point I did what any sensible human being would have done. Collapsed on myself for five minutes, then pulled myself together. I don't even remember the Opening speech I gave, except that it was funny. The moment the show shifted abruptly from Paul's Monologue to the Star Wars Cantina music and I heard the audience laugh, all that fear melted off. We all did our scenes and our bits damn near flawlessly from what I heard, even if there were accidents, no one noticed, or minded. The show worked.
What got me was just how many people were at the audience, and WHO was in the audience. I saw people from Jedi who I had only seen through youtube videos, some of which convinced me to join outright. The most shocking surprise was hearing that Voltaire, the musician responcible for the now infamous (well, in Jedi, anyways) song "When you're evil" was in the audience, and he loved the show.
The end of the show came, and I just this rush of pride. In myself, in the group, and in the cast and crew. We had done it.
Of course, by now, my voice was shot. It lasted right up until I punched our Brandon in our fight, then it went kablooey. I've spent all day in bed with the sickness I evaded yesterday kicking my ass five fold today.
It was worth it, all of it.
And I want to do it again. There's already talks of another one for The Tank. Also, at least two other groups have asked to use the Poker Night format. So this is just the beginning.
Thank you for coming, for participating, for being my friends and family, and for letting me in on the madness.
Thank you.
I look forward to seeing you for Poker Night 2: Poker Night vs the World Crime League
C